Saturday, September 7, 2013

Syria Situation By John Cleese. Recall of Purina ONE beyOnd. Chobani Recall. National Parks Battle. Uncle Sam. The Blitz.

 

For “Summary Saturday”: News items, some old, some new, that you might not have seen.

John Cleese has it about right:

John Cleese has it about right: 

"The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.

-- John Cleese - British writer, actor and tall person."The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from "...Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.”
-- By John Cleese - British writer, actor and tall person.

________

Recall of Purina ONE beyOnd White Meat Chicken & Whole Barley Recipe Adult Dry Dog Food Bags

August 30, 2013 -  “Nestlé Purina PetCare Company (NPPC) is voluntarily recalling a limited number of 3.5-pound bags of its Purina ONE beyOnd Our White Meat Chicken & Whole Barley Recipe Adult Dry Dog Food from a single production run and shipped to retail customers in the United States. This is being done because one bag of the product was found to be contaminated with Salmonella.

Only Purina ONE beyOnd Our White Meat Chicken & Whole Barley Recipe Adult Dry Dog Food with both the "Best By" date and the production code shown below are included in this voluntary recall:

Bag Size
3.5 lb.

"Best By" Date & Production Code*
OCT 2014 31071083

UPC Code 17800 12679”    More at:   http://www.fda.gov/Safety/Recalls/ucm366953.htm
________

Chobani Recalls Greek Yogurt Cups

NEW YORK -- “Chobani says it's recalling some of its Greek yogurt cups that were affected by mold, a move prompted by reports of illnesses by some customers.

The recall comes about a week after the company first started asking retailers to pull the products from shelves, saying some cups were "swelling and bloating." Chobani had previously said it wasn't issuing a formal recall.

The containers are marked with the code 16-012 and expiration dates Sept. 11 to Oct. 7.”  More at: http://abcnews.go.com/Business/wireStory/chobani-recalls-greek-yogurt-cups-20162634

________

The Battle for a Grand Bargain

image “From an interpretive ranger who learned she would not be rehired this summer to a bed and breakfast owner struggling financially due to fewer tourists, budget cuts to national parks have had wide-ranging impacts on people around the country.

Congress returns from its summer recess this month with just a few working days to strike a federal budget agreement. Learn more about people affected and take action to tell lawmakers what’s at stake if they don’t fix the broken budget process.”   Learn More » 

http://www.parkadvocate.org/national-parks-are-a-grand-bargain-congress-must-stop-the-damage-to-americas-best-idea/

Infographic

Please sign at: TAKE ACTION: Please contact your Senators and Representatives and urge them to restore adequate funding to the National Park Service budget. npca.org/parkfunding

_______

United States nicknamed Uncle Sam, Sep 7, 1813:

“On this day in 1813, the United States gets its nickname, Uncle Sam. The name is linked to Samuel Wilson, a meat packer from Troy, New York, who supplied barrels of beef to the United States Army during the War of 1812. Wilson (1766-1854) stamped the barrels with "U.S." for United States, but soldiers began referring to the grub as "Uncle Sam's." The local newspaper picked up on the story and Uncle Sam eventually gained widespread acceptance as the nickname for the U.S. federal government.”

_______

The Blitz begins, Sep 7, 1940:

“On this day in 1940, 300 German bombers raid London, in the first of 57 consecutive nights of bombing. This bombing "blitzkrieg" (lightning war) would continue until May 1941.

Since June, English vessels in the Channel had been attacked and aerial battles had been fought over Britain, as Germany attempted to wear down the Royal Air Force in anticipation of a land invasion. But with Germany failing to cripple Britain's air power, especially in the Battle of Britain, Hitler changed strategies. A land invasion was now ruled out as unrealistic; instead Hitler chose sheer terror as his weapon of choice.

British intelligence had had an inkling of the coming bombardment. Evidence of the large-scale movement of German barges in the Channel and the interrogation of German spies had led them to the correct conclusion-unfortunately, it was just as the London docks were suffering the onslaught of Day One of the Blitz. By the end of the day, German planes had dropped 337 tons of bombs on London. Even though civilian populations were not the primary target that day, the poorest of London slum areas-the East End--felt the fallout literally, from direct hits of errant bombs as well as the fires that broke out and spread throughout the vicinity. Four hundred and forty-eight civilians were killed that afternoon and evening.

A little past 8 p.m., British military units were alerted with the code name "Cromwell," meaning the German invasion had begun. A state of emergency broke out in England; even home defense units were put to the ready. One of Hitler's key strategic blunders of the war was to consistently underestimate the will and courage of the British people. They would not run or be cowed into submission. They would fight.”

_______

Yesterday:

Misty and I went to get Jay, and had a slow walk down there.  Misty was so intent on sniffing so many places that some critter must have been by there.

Jay and I put up the next panel, which is a skylight, in the roof over the front porch. Then the mower, which hadn’t been cranked for a while as it has been so dry, actually started at the third pull.  Jay mowed most of the front yard and on the side lot, and that was enough for the day.

No comments: